Hash Songs You'll Hear in our Circle... and more
For the edification of visitors, new hashers and the French, this page shows the words to a few of our favourite songs and helps you connect up with a whole bunch of new ones. If you don't see the song you're looking for then take a look at this list of more than 600 songs . We have some pretty cool videos to watch, some of which may even include you...
We always enjoy Hashers bringing their creative lyrics to our circle for a spin so don't be shy. We'll even provide you some free down-down beers!
All Australians...
All Australians are born illegitimate, born illegitimate, born illegitimate
All Australians are born illegitimate, bastards through and through
They aint got no birth certificate, birth certificate, birth certificate
They aint got no birth certificate, bastards through and through
Traditional Down Down Song
Here's to _____, he's true blue.
He's a hasher through and through,
He's a pisspot so they say.
Tried to get to heaven,
But he went the other way.
Drink it down, down, down, down, etc.
Hares' Song
And the hairs, (and the hairs), and the hairs, (and the hairs),
And the hairs on her dicky-di-do hung down to her knees.
One black one, one white one,
And one with a bit of shite on,
And the hairs on her dicky-di-do hung down to her knees.
Selected other verses:
She came from Glamorgan with a cunt like a barrel organ ...
You'd need a coal miner to find her vagina ...
If she were my daughter I'd have them cut shorter ...
She came down from Florida with aunt like a fucking corridor ...
The aroma it lingers, it smells like fish fingers ...
She married an Italian, with balls like a fucking stallion ...
I folded her lips back, and there found a six-pack ...
I flicked it, I licked it, I even drop kicked it...
The Hare is a [Scots] git, he's going to get Hash Shit ...
Why Was He Born So Beautiful?
Why was he born so beautiful,
Why was he born at all.
He's no fucking use to anyone,
He's no fucking use at all.
He might be a joy to his mother,
But he's a pain in the asshole to me!
He's the Meanest
He's the meanest,
He sucks the horse's penis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
All he does is pound it,
Ever since he found it,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
He's always pissing on us,
He's rotten and dishonest,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
Ou Est Le Papier?
A Frenchman went to the lavatory,
To have a jolly good shit.
He took his pants and trousers down,
So that he could revel in it.
But when he reached for the paper,
He found that someone had been there before ...
Ou est le papier?
Ou est le papier?
Monsieur, monsieur,
Je fait manure.
Ou est le papier?
He's Our Leader
Tune : 'He's the meanest', sung to GM Murkury
He's our leader; a slap-head little bleeder. He's our leader; he's a turtle head.
And a growing list of verses:
A quiet little fellow; he looks like Donatello. He's our leader; He's a turtle head.
His hair it once was ginger; now he's a slap-head Ninja. He's ...
When it's time for action; his head's in full retraction. He's ...
From beaches he is banned; he lays eggs in the sand. He's ...
How can he find a bride; when he's drawn his head inside? He's ...
He's gonna make you suffer; he used to be a fluffer. He's ...
In a wig he needs protection; he gave Wanda an erection. He's ...
He's bald, his legs are bandy; he looks a bit like Ghandi. He's...
He looks a bit like Nelson; after a year in Belsen. He's ...
He's got a dog called Tiger; he puts his cock inside her. He's ...
He finds it quite a hustle; shagging a Jack Russell. He's ...
He is our little gem; he is our new GM. He's ...
He looks a fucking twat; in that GM's hat. He's ...
His bald head's his best feature; he smells like a sea-creature. He's ...
With branches he's not copin'; they split his bald head open. He's ...
He is a little fucker; his dog is a cock-sucker. He's ...
He's balder than Charles Dickens; his dog likes killing chickens. He's ...
His dog's got a sore bum; it's full of turtle cum. He's ...
He cannot get a boner; that's why he is a loner. He's ...
On runs he's seldom seen; he blends in 'cos he's green. He's ...
He seldom leaves his house; 'cos he's scared of Minnie Mouse. He's ...
(Bluey / Billy Boy / Jungle Balls / Dr F J / No Hope / Barbie Doll)
Beer
Well we try them all and it might sound queer
But our favorite drug is an ice-cold beer
Beer, beer, beer, beer
Beer, beer, beer, beer
Beer, beer, beer, beer
We love beer
Drink it down, down, down, down...
Her Left Tit
Her left tit hangs down to her right tit
Her right tit hangs down to her knee
If her left tit did equal her right tit
She'd still get a down-down from me
Drink it down, down, down, down...
Meet the Hashers
Hashers, meet the hashers
They're the biggest drunks in history
From the hash of Phuket
They're the leaders in debauchery
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years
Watch them, as they down a lot of beer
Drink it down, down, down, down...
Soldier Song
Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee
For cunt, for cunt, for country and my queen
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
Drink it down, down, down, down...
You Are My Hash Shit
You are my hash shit, my only hash shit
You make me happy when skies are gray
You never no dear how much I love you
Please don't take my hash shit away
Drink it down, down, down, down...
Three Big Beers
Three big beers, Three big beers
See how they foam, see how they foam
You ran through the shiggy around the trail
Now the GM told an evil tale
So now you must drink down your ale
It's three big beers, three big beers
Drink it down, down, down, down...
(Bollox)
All Beers Bright and Beautiful
All beers bright and beautiful
All down-downs great and small
All ales pale with hops a-full
You're going to drink them all
Each little bottle opened
Each bitter tasty zing
You will guzzle down the lot
And then we shan't have to sing
Drink it down, down, down, down...
(Bollox)
We're Hashers
We're hashers, from Phuket, we're so far from home
We're fokken bedonnered so leave us alone
We drink to get drunk and we smoke to get high
So if you don't like it then fuck off and die
If the ocean was whiskey and I was a duck
I'd swim to the bottom and drink it all up
But the ocean's not whiskey and I'm not a duck
So let's go down Bangla and have us a fuck!
(Bottom Feeder & Donkey Manure)
Phuket Hash Anthem
Tune : 'Halls of Montezuma'
We don't mark checks and falsies
You're on paper or you're not
We run around the condom trees
We don't care if it's wet or hot
Chorus
We're the runners that you cannot catch
We drink like you've never seen
We sing like fine tuned arseholes
We're the Phuket Hash House team
We don't care for our reputation
We even tolerate katoeys
We'll give it to old age pensioners
But we prefer little boys
We don't remember being sober
We've been pissed all our lives
We've all got pretty girlfriends
But please don't tell our wives
We've got beaches bars and jungles
We've got ladyboys and girls
We don't get storms or hurricanes
Just the best blowjobs in the world.
(Sir Bollox)
Generic Blues
I woke up this morning
Down-Down-Down
I went to the hash
Down-Down-Down
But you was so bad there
Down-Down-Down
So now you'll down down
Down-Down-Down
Down-down-down-down-down
Down-down-down
(Bollox)
Topoff the Tailor Man
He's Topoff the tailor man.
He lives under a turban
He'll make you a suit
And make curry to boot
He's Topoff the tailor man
(Julie Andrews / Jungle Balls)
Our Favourite Beers
San Mig and Singha in bottles and cans,
Beer Lao and Tiger and Hei-nee-kans.
Chang if you're desperate,
But none for the queers.
These are a few of our favourite beers.
Down down down etc.
(Jungle Balls)
She's All Right
She's all right, she's all right,
She's little bit flat-chested, but she's all right
Girl from Singapore
She's a dirty mother-fucker, she's a lousy whore,
She's a girl from Singapore
Do Re Mi
Dough, the stuff that buys me beer
Ray, the guy who serves me beer
Me, the guy who drinks the beer
Far, a long long way for beer
So, I'll have another beer
La, la la la la la beer
Tea, no thanks I'm drinking beer
Which brings us back to
Down, down, down down
Two Beers
We drink two beers in the morning
We drink two beers at night
We drink two beers in the afternoon
It makes us feel alright
We drink two beers in times of peace
And two in times of war
We drink two beers before we drink two beers
And then we drink two more
Drink it down, down, down, down...
This is your Down-Down Song...
This is your Down-Down song,
It isn't very long. . . .
I Like Hashing
I like hashing,
I like hashing,
Hashings fun,
Hashings fun.
Fill up all the hash mugs,
Fill up all the hash mugs,
One by one,
One by one.
Drink it down, down, down, down...
Jump Down Turnaround
Tune: Pick-a-bale-of-cotton
Jump down, turn around, drink another down - down
Jump down, turn around, drink another beer
Oh lordy, drink another down – down
Oh lordy, drink another beer
Down – down – down, drink another beer now
Down – down – down, drink another beer...
(Bollox)
Smoke and No Water
Smoke and no water, Or you'll be on the ice
Smoke and no water, This beer is no surprise
Down-down-down down-down-down-down
down-down-down down-down
(Bollox/Mrs Higgins)
Hares Blues
Tune: I got the blues for you
You made up this run
As you went along
Now weeee got some booooze for you
Down-down-down-down, down-down-down-down,
Down-doooown-down-down-down-down ...
Or ...
You came on the run
But then you did us wrong
Now weeee got some booooze for you
Down-down-down-down, down-down-down-down,
Down-doooown-down-down-down-down ...
(A Bollox original)
Jumping Jack Flash
We did a run in a crossfire hurricane
We went out, we ran and then we came right back
It's not all right, now, In fact it's a drag
It's not alright now
A double down-down gives you gas, gas, gas
Down – down down- down- down - down- down- down
down- down- down
Down – down down- down- down - down- down- down ...
(A Bollox original)
The Mayors of Bayswater's Daughter
The Mayor of Bayswater had only one daughter
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS:
And the hairs, and the hairs
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees
One black one, one white one
and one with a bit of shite on,
and one with a fairy light on,
TO SHOW US THE WAY!
CHORUS
If she was my daughter I'd have them cut shorter
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
I've touched it, I've felt it, it was just like a piece of velvet
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
I've seen it, I've seen it, I've been in between it
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
You'd have to be a coal miner to find her vagina
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She married an Italian with balls like a bloody stallion
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She lived in a lighthouse which was more like a fu#king shitehouse
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
Her mum came from Glanmorgan and had a c##t like a barrel organ
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She slept with a demon who washed her with semen
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She came from Seattle and went down on cattle
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She went to Vancouver and slurped like a friggin' Hoover
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
Her mat was so tangled her first-born was strangled
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.
CHORUS
She said she's no whore, but she bangs like a shithouse door
And the hairs on her dicky di do hung down to her knees.